OMAHA, NE – City leaders in Omaha issued an emergency economic warning Monday after LSU baseball failed to make the College World Series, eliminating what experts describe as “roughly 83% of the city’s annual revenue.”
Officials say local bars, restaurants and hotels had spent months preparing for the annual rush of LSU fans participating in the famous Rocco’s Jello Shot Challenge, where they routinely spend enough money to briefly alter Nebraska’s entire GDP.
“We had inventory stacked to the ceiling,” said one devastated manager at Rocco’s. “There are currently 14,000 untouched lemon drop shots sitting in storage with nobody willing to scream ‘Geaux Tigers’ before ordering them.”
Economic analysts estimate Omaha businesses may lose millions this summer without the arrival of LSU fans including Todd Graves and Gordon McKernan, whose yearly shot purchases have reportedly become a significant pillar of the local economy.
Several area hotels confirmed they had already begun removing temporary purple-and-gold pricing surcharges originally added in anticipation of LSU’s arrival.
Meanwhile, McKernan reportedly redirected his unused Omaha shot budget toward purchasing 117 additional Interstate billboards from the Northshore to Lake Charles.
