Festival organizers confirmed Louisiana was removed from the tour after reports surfaced that state officials wanted a live Texas steer roaming concert crowds to “restore authenticity.”
Officials confirmed the meeting would proceed normally, noting that offshore connectivity issues are considered standard practice in modern customer service and public accountability.
New Orleans officials say Kamala Harris was chosen to identify drainage root causes, citing her ability to speak at length without offering timelines, solutions, or any measurable outcomes.
DOTD insists the Pecue interchange is performing flawlessly, provided drivers abandon instinct, common sense, and any expectations formed by decades of Baton Rouge commuting.
LSU officials say flamingos standing in freshly disturbed mud forced another delay, adding months and millions to a lakes project that continues to evolve faster than its completion date.
Waze users noted the notices rarely change destinations, only routes, reflecting how quickly abnormal conditions have become part of everyday decision-making.
The governor’s office said no deployment orders exist yet, but volunteers were encouraged to prepare boats, cold-weather gear, and the confidence required to arrive before anyone asks for help.
A new report crowns Louisiana worst in road rage again, leaving residents confused why other states thought they were even in the race.
A courtroom plea meets Louisiana tradition, as a former House Speaker’s defense points to the state’s long history of misplacing things and acting surprised when someone notices.
In an unexpected break from parish tradition, St. George officials chose to pause the project, review traffic and flooding concerns, and resist the urge to approve first and explain consequences later.
A judge has officially shut down the store but not the scene, removing the owner while leaving everything else exactly where it’s always been.
City officials confirmed New Orleans eliminated its entire debt after liquidating former Mayor LaToya Cantrell’s frequent flier miles, a move accountants called “embarrassingly effective.”
Governor Jeff Landry reportedly offered to run Venezuela, while casually assigning Billy Nungesser to handle Greenland.
Republican voters finally found common ground with one of her decisions, and the farewell party location may have said the quiet part out loud.
Louisiana officials confirmed that calling police to report a hands-free driving violation also counts as a hands-free violation, effectively ensuring every concerned citizen remains equally guilty.
Minnesota officials cautioned that cracking down on massive fraud now could discourage future participation, undermine trust, and create unrealistic expectations that taxpayer money is actually monitored.
The government’s alleged chemtrail operation has reportedly stalled, not because of exposure, but because officials can’t find pilots willing to gas themselves and everyone they love.
Louisiana officials confirmed the Mississippi River bridge study group has been instructed by Jeff Landry to expand its scope internationally, adding a preliminary review of a possible bridge connecting the U.S. to Greenland.
The Trump campaign labeled Nicki Minaj’s endorsement a “cultural drop,” admitting the phrase sounded confident enough to avoid follow-up questions or the need for an actual explanation.
Chuck Schumer’s approval rating has fallen so low that aides now describe it as “conceptual,” insisting leadership isn’t about popularity but about enduring long enough for voters to forget why they were annoyed.
Greenland tried football without traditions. Jeff Landry fixed that by mandating live polar bears on the sidelines, proving Louisiana solutions work everywhere, regardless of climate, common sense, or liability laws.
