Tiger Fans Begin Annual Tradition of Convincing Themselves This Is The Most Talented Team Ever Assembled
The yearly ritual reportedly began minutes after the first practice photos were released, with fans immediately pointing to the size of the offensive line and speed of incoming freshmen.
LSU Creates Official STTDB Etiquette Guide For Weddings And Corporate Events
LSU officials say years of confusion have finally forced the university to publish formal guidelines explaining exactly when fans should, and should not, yell STTDB in public.
Baton Rouge Marriage Counselors Prepare For LSU Football Season By Hiring Additional Staff
Baton Rouge marriage counselors say football season is their busiest time of year, and LSU hasn’t even played a game yet.
LSU Introduces Dynamic Ticket Pricing That Increases After Every Touchdown
LSU says it learned valuable lessons from last year’s ticket price controversy. This year, prices won’t go up until the Tigers actually start scoring touchdowns.
2026 LSU Football Team Shocked to Learn Coach O’s Voice Is Not Artificially Enhanced
Several LSU players admitted they thought Coach O’s legendary Cajun growl was partially AI-generated until attending their first team meeting.
Post Malone’s Tour Bus Stuck in I-10 Traffic on Spillway, Forced to Cancel May 23 Concert
LSU fans are devastated after Post Malone’s tour bus became trapped on the Spillway, with GPS estimates now placing arrival sometime near football season.
Tiger Stadium Connectivity Upgrade Will Allow 100,000 Fans To Post “How Much Is The Buyout?” Simultaneously
Engineers confirmed the $45 million connectivity upgrade was specifically engineered to handle simultaneous uploads of blurry targeting replays, emotional coaching buyouts, and urgent chants of “Play Neck” in high definition.
LSU Officials Admit NBA YoungBoy Concert May Be First Event Where People Stay Through the End
LSU officials admit an NBA YoungBoy concert may finally test whether Tiger Stadium can hold a crowd until the end, something football, graduations, and weather delays have failed to accomplish.
Zach Bryan Agrees to Play at LSU, Demands All Concession Stands Serve Drinks With No Ice
Zach Bryan’s LSU concert will now serve room-temperature drinks after the singer demanded all concessions remove ice to “avoid mixed signals.”
Kelly Takes Credit for LSU’s Win Over Arkansas Saturday, Insists He Still Isn’t Fired “As Far as He Knows.”
Brian Kelly took to Facebook after LSU’s win, posting a selfie and insisting he’s still the Tigers’ head coach because no one has officially fired him “to his face.”
Governor Assumes Roles of LSU President, AD, and Head Football Coach, Rebrands It as Landry State University
Governor Jeff Landry has officially taken over LSU, assuming the roles of president, athletic director, and head coach in what he calls a “streamlined model of leadership efficiency.”
Brian Kelly Seen Exiting Tiger Stadium Late in 3rd Quarter “To Avoid the Rush”
LSU Head Coach Brian Kelly was reportedly seen leaving Tiger Stadium before the game ended, citing “unmanageable postgame traffic.”
LSU Hires Ed Orgeron as Head of Tailgate Security, Contract Includes Furnished Condo Near Sorority Row
LSU hires Ed Orgeron as Head of Tailgate Security, complete with a campus apartment near Sorority Row and full control over gameday cooler logistics.
Rep. McMakin Named Voice of LSU; Immediately Drafts Resolution Requiring NECK to be Played After Touchdowns
Fans were stunned Tuesday when newly named LSU announcer and State Rep. Dixon McMakin filed an immediate resolution requiring the band to blast “Neck” following every touchdown at Tiger Stadium.