WASHINGTON, DC – Former Alabama coach Nick Saban appeared before Congress recently to discuss the future of college athletics, but much of the hearing reportedly focused on what he described as an increasingly alarming lack of media balance whenever LSU coach Lane Kiffin is discussed.
According to sources, Saban proposed a new federal guideline requiring sports networks, podcasts, and social media accounts to mention him at least once for every three references to Kiffin.
“We’re not saying people can’t talk about Lane,” Saban clarified. “We’re simply asking for reasonable acknowledgment of who taught him how to stand on a sideline and absolutely lose his mind after every penalty.”
The proposal comes as Kiffin continues to dominate SEC headlines through recruiting victories, transfer portal additions, and his ability to generate controversy by merely posting a picture of a hamburger on social media.
Witnesses said Saban presented lawmakers with several binders containing recent sports coverage and highlighted hundreds of instances where Kiffin was mentioned without any accompanying reminder that he once worked for Alabama’s legendary coach.
Congressional aides described the presentation as “surprisingly thorough.”
Kiffin responded by posting a photo of himself drinking an Abita Purple Haze on Instagram with no caption, which generated another media frenzy that interrupted coverage of the Iranian war in at least 6 southern states.