BIRMINGHAM, AL – SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey announced Tuesday that LSU has left him no choice but to escalate the conference’s ongoing dispute to the highest authority available: his mother.
“I tried making rules. I tried lawsuits. I tried threatening to kick them out of the conference,” Sankey said. “At some point, you run out of options.”
According to SEC officials, Sankey had hoped to resolve the situation without getting his mother involved, but LSU’s continued refusal to do what he says has forced the commissioner to consider more serious measures.
Sources say Sankey has already drafted a text explaining everything LSU has done, including several parts that he believes were “completely unfair.”
LSU officials reportedly remain unconcerned, noting that Sankey has threatened to tell his mother twice before but never actually followed through.
Sankey warned LSU not to test him.
“I’m serious this time,” he said. “And if Mom can’t straighten this out, Dad gets home around six.”
