ST. GEORGE, LA – In a move that some are calling audacious and others already calling logistics nightmares, LSU officials on Tuesday unveiled a sweeping plan to relocate the entire campus to a stretch of land off of Brightside near Highland Road in St. George. The justification? Safety.
It’s hard to blame them: over the past few weeks, LSU has seen multiple shootings on or adjacent to campus. On Oct. 11, two people were injured near Highland and Dalrymple during the homecoming festivities, prompting multiple agencies to investigate. Earlier in the semester, other gunfire reports surfaced near campus grounds.
The property where the University is moving to was purchased just months earlier by Jeff Landry & Associates, LLC, a brand new real estate investment company, only to be quietly resold to LSU at a premium 24 hours later. When asked for comment by The Sadvocate, LSU sources claimed they “just couldn’t pass up such a good deal.”
Under the new plan, LSU’s future campus would sit off Highland Road near St. George, surrounded by subdivisions, roundabouts, and people who still wave at their neighbors. Administrators say the location offers “an ideal blend of safety and Starbucks access,” while planners boast that traffic will “only be bad half the day instead of all of it.” Early renderings feature a reimagined Tiger Stadium next to a golf course, new student housing tucked behind gated communities, and a campus police station designed mostly for writing parking tickets instead of conducting homicide investigations.
Several “Baton Rouge leaders” vowed to “fight to keep LSU where it belongs,” though most admitted they couldn’t recall the last time they actually set foot near campus after dark.
