BATON ROUGE, LA – In a move that stunned absolutely no one, Louisiana Governor Jeff Landry declared, “I’ll sign any insurance bill,” before promptly vetoing the first one that crossed his desk.
The vetoed bill, which aimed to provide modest relief to homeowners being financially waterboarded by skyrocketing insurance premiums, apparently failed to meet the Governor’s criteria of looking helpful without actually doing anything.
A spokesperson for the Governor stated, “He remains fully committed to solving the insurance crisis — just not through legislation, logic, or anything that might accidentally be useful to the public.”
What began as a sweeping promise to sign “any” insurance bill has now been clarified to mean “any bill that meets 47 secret conditions, two industry vetos, and doesn’t interfere with campaign donations.”
Lawmakers say the bill will return next session, likely rebranded as The Premium Hike Preservation Act — a title better aligned with the priorities of everyone who doesn’t actually own a home.
