OXFORD, MS – Local officials issued an air quality alert Saturday after thousands of LSU fans arriving for the Ole Miss game simultaneously began making roux across Oxford.
The situation reportedly developed shortly after sunrise, when LSU tailgaters fired up propane burners, cast-iron pots and enough cooking equipment to cater a medium sized Louisiana parish.
“We initially thought there was a large industrial fire somewhere south of campus,” said one Oxford official. “Then somebody smelled onions and bell peppers and we realized what we were dealing with.”
By mid-morning, a thick brown haze reportedly stretched from The Grove to several nearby parking lots, with visibility dropping significantly anywhere downwind of an LSU tailgate.
Ole Miss fans were advised to remain calm and avoid approaching any Louisiana resident aggressively stirring a pot.
Officials briefly considered evacuating The Grove before learning the roux had finally reached the right color.
