VERMILLION PARISH, LA – Thousands of Louisiana residents officially ended their brief careers as data center experts this week, immediately accepting new positions in rocket science following news of a massive SpaceX investment in the state.
For the past several months, Louisiana social media has been home to thousands of self-taught authorities on data centers, electrical grids, water consumption, tax incentives and artificial intelligence infrastructure.
But with rockets suddenly entering the conversation, many have seamlessly transitioned into aerospace engineering.
“I spent most of June explaining to people why they were wrong about data centers,” said one local housewife with a GED who spends roughly nine hours a day on Facebook. “Now I’m explaining orbital mechanics, rocket propulsion and launch trajectories. It’s really not that different.”
Officials say the transition has been remarkably smooth, with most residents requiring only one SpaceX article and approximately four Facebook comments before achieving expert status.
Several newly certified rocket scientists have already begun correcting Elon Musk and most have expressed dismay that he hasn’t replied.
Residents were reminded to keep their data center credentials current in case Meta or Jeff Landry make another announcement next week.
