Baton Rouge Marriage Counselors Prepare For LSU Football Season By Hiring Additional Staff
Baton Rouge marriage counselors say football season is their busiest time of year, and LSU hasn’t even played a game yet.
Coffee Call Beignet Powder Officially Detected On Residents As Far Away As Dallas, Texas
Researchers say traces of Coffee Call beignet powder have been found on former Baton Rouge residents living in Dallas, confirming what locals have suspected for years.
LSU Introduces Dynamic Ticket Pricing That Increases After Every Touchdown
LSU says it learned valuable lessons from last year’s ticket price controversy. This year, prices won’t go up until the Tigers actually start scoring touchdowns.
Survey: 90% Of Baton Rouge Directions Still Contain “When You Pass Fleur de Lis”
Baton Rouge residents may have smartphones, GPS, and navigation apps, but apparently none of them have replaced the city’s most trusted landmark.
Local Man Attends Crawfish Boil Strictly To Critique Other People’s Boiling Technique
Louisiana researchers estimate that roughly 18% of all crawfish consumed each spring are eaten by people whose primary contribution was complaining about the boil.
EBR Schools to Create Task Force To Determine Exactly How Much Fun Graduates Are Allowed To Have
After years of tackling academic performance, school safety, and staffing challenges, EBR Schools has finally turned its attention to the issue residents were definitely losing sleep over: graduation dancing.
EBR Schools Marks Seven Straight Days Without Campus Gun Incident
EBR administrators marked seven straight incident-free days this week, a streak experts are attributing primarily to locked doors and zero students.
Wildlife Investigators Say Goose Was Crushed by Falling “Project Completion Estimate: 2023” Sign Near LSU Lakes
The LSU Lakes project reportedly entered a new phase this week after investigators concluded a goose was crushed by a rotting construction sign promising completion back in 2023.
East Baton Rouge Library System Quietly Classified as Louisiana’s Third-Largest Financial Institution
Baton Rouge residents were shocked this week to learn the parish library system now reportedly has enough reserve funds to qualify for its own regional banking charter.
Baton Rouge Man Declares Bankruptcy After Son Joins Travel Baseball Team
Baton Rouge father reportedly entered financial distress just weeks after learning travel baseball requires luxury hotel stays, $400 bats, and enough team dues to fund a small SEC athletic department.
Study: Marijuana Users Saving Hundreds by Driving Down Sherwood With Windows Down
LSU researchers say Baton Rouge drivers are saving hundreds on marijuana simply by sitting in Sherwood Forest traffic with the windows down long enough to miss two green lights in a row.
Louisiana DCFS Says Missing Paperwork Since 2012 Shows Long-Term Commitment To Reducing Clutter
After auditors discovered the same problems dating back to 2012, DCFS reportedly explained that eliminating paperwork entirely has dramatically improved office organization.
Baton Rouge HOA Fence Dispute Enters Fourth Generation of Family Involvement
Baton Rouge HOA residents are now involving entire bloodlines in a years-long Facebook war over fence height. The original fence may be gone, but the arguments remain stronger than ever.
EBR Leaders Concerned Residents May Discover Successful Schools Keep Appearing Everywhere Around Them
Parish officials fear parents may begin expecting functioning schools after noticing nearby districts somehow figured it out years ago.
Baton Rouge Ankle Monitoring Company Celebrates 100th Customer-Related Shooting Incident
A Baton Rouge ankle monitoring company is celebrating a major milestone after its devices officially reached 100 customer-related shootings without a single equipment failure.
Landry Reassigns Entire DMV Workforce to Recall Verification Division, Results Expected by Early 2031
Jeff Landry’s newest strategy for surviving a recall reportedly involves routing every signature through the same people handling Real IDs and broken ticket printers.
After Supreme Court Tosses Map, Senior Official Confirms It Was Drawn by His 5-Year-Old Neice for “Fresh Perspective”
Louisiana’s rejected congressional map might make more sense now after officials confirmed it was originally drawn by a 5-year-old before being “cleaned up” for presentation.
District Court Tests Pilot Program Letting Violent Offenders Pre-Schedule Their Next Release
Baton Rouge courts are rolling out a new pilot program aimed at efficiency, and critics say it may be the most honest acknowledgment yet of how predictable the system has become.
Baton Rouge Activists Complete Impressive Career Shift From City Planning Experts to School District Authorities
Local experts who just wrapped up their decade-long run as city planners have already rebranded as education policy specialists. Officials say the turnaround time was “impressively aggressive.”
EBR Launches “Suffering Builds Character” Campaign to Discourage St. George School Breakaway
With St. George looking to leave, EBR leaders are doubling down, saying the real education was the disappointment students experienced along the way.
Longtime Pothole Earns Landmark Status After Outlasting Several Mayors And Repair Budgets
A pothole on Airline Highway has officially achieved what most projects never do, completion through neglect and recognition through survival.
Delta Customers Establish Official “Bill Opening Support Group,” Urge Friends to Attend
Baton Rouge residents are no longer opening Delta bills alone, they’re hosting full “Bill Opening Nights” with friends just to confirm the numbers are actually real.
New Insurance Reform Bill Requires Rate Increases To Be Explained Using Smaller Words
The state tackled high insurance rates by making companies explain them in simpler terms. Good news, you’ll finally understand why you’re paying more every month.
Louisiana Legislature Passes Bipartisan Resolution Declaring Everyone Else The Problem
Lawmakers say the new policy will save time, reduce confusion, and provide voters with the clarity they deserve about who is definitely not responsible.
Baton Rouge Furniture Store Celebrates 1,000th Consecutive Day Of Going Out Of Business
Locals are beginning to suspect “going out of business” might not actually mean what it says, especially after 1,000 consecutive days of the same sale.
Local Rants & Raves Facebook Group Solves Absolutely Nothing for 47th Consecutive Day
One of Baton Rouge’s most active Facebook groups just hit an impressive streak, 47 straight days of solving absolutely nothing, while somehow generating hundreds of comments and even more confusion.
Man Completes Errand On Siegen Lane In Under 2 Hours, Declared Local Legend
A Baton Rouge man completed a full errand on Siegen Lane in under two hours, prompting officials to investigate what they’re calling a “temporary and highly suspicious lapse in traffic conditions.”
Baton Rouge Residents Begin Measuring Distance in “How Many Red Lights” Instead of Miles
Residents say the new system finally reflects reality, where a “quick trip” can mean sitting through four lights and watching the same car next to you age in real time.
CATS Says Emailing Bank Statement Monthly Impossible Due to Ongoing Shortage Of Non-Arrested Employees
CATS officials say a simple monthly task, downloading a bank statement, attaching it to an email, and clicking send, isn’t feasible given current staffing challenges.
Driver Successfully Completes LSU Lakes Loop Without Getting Stuck Behind Jogger, Calls It ‘Best Day of My Life’
A Baton Rouge driver just completed the LSU Lakes loop without getting stuck behind a jogger, and honestly, we’re not sure the city is ready for this kind of progress.