MIAMI, FL – Tropical Storm Dolly formed in the Atlantic this week, immediately threatening to become the first Dolly in recorded history to leave a community worse than she found it.
Meteorologists said the storm could bring heavy rain, damaging winds and flooding, a dramatic departure from the traditional Dolly experience of giving away books, funding education and generally making life better for everyone involved.
“For decades, if someone told you Dolly was coming to town, that was considered great news,” said one National Hurricane Center employee. “This is the first time we’ve advised people to board up their windows.”
Officials stressed that tropical storm names are selected years in advance and that Dolly’s formation shortly after Dolly Parton’s death is purely coincidental.
Still, coastal residents admitted they were struggling to reconcile the warning with decades of overwhelmingly positive Dolly experiences.
“We love Dolly,” said one Florida resident while loading plywood into his truck. “But apparently we need to be a little more specific now.”
