SEOUL, SK – South Korean officials are preparing for Baton Rouge native NBA YoungBoy’s arrival by opening 100 Raising Cane’s restaurants and erecting at least 300 Gordon McKernan billboards.
Officials said the rapper might become homesick if he travels more than twenty feet without seeing a Cane’s drive-thru or Gordon’s smiling face.
“We want him to feel like he never left Baton Rouge,” said one official. “By Friday, every major intersection will have three Cane’s locations, all serving the exact same four menu items.”
Workers are also building a miniature Mississippi River bridge where motorists can sit motionless while eating Box Combos and wondering why they didn’t take the old bridge.
Entergy offered to recreate an authentic Louisiana power grid, but Korean engineers rejected the proposal after learning light rain could knock it offline.
Officials completed the welcome package by renaming a Seoul neighborhood “St. George,” although residents immediately began arguing over who must pay for it.
South Korean officials were confused why Gordon delivered 10,000 free backpacks when no one had asked for them.
