BATON ROUGE, La. – With insurance premiums skyrocketing and voter frustration reaching generational levels, Louisiana lawmakers revealed their latest bold plan to tackle the crisis: continue talking about it endlessly until the problem—and most of the voters—go away.
“This is a very serious issue,” said one lawmaker who has served for 19 years without passing a single reform bill. “We just need a few more decades of robust discussion, preferably behind closed doors.”
State officials unveiled a new multi-phase strategy:
Phase 1: Express concern.
Phase 2: Form a task force.
Phase 3: Hold a press conference.
Phase 4: Wait until everyone forgets.
The announcement was paired with a new public awareness campaign titled: “Hope Isn’t Dead—It’s Just Buried Under a Mountain of Insurance Bills.
When asked about last year’s failed reform effort, one senator blamed “unforeseen circumstances,” including a recent, distracting turkey hunt with lobbyists and attorneys.
Sources say the next major step in the legislature’s bold insurance strategy involves forming a new task force—specifically to investigate why the previous task force never met, never reported findings, and may have never actually existed.
