BATON ROUGE, LA – Louisiana Treasurer John Fleming announced a new “integrity initiative” this week to ensure that the state’s remaining millions in unclaimed property only go to “responsible, values-aligned citizens.”
Under the new program, a specially appointed Unclaimed Property Task Force will reportedly review applicants’ social media activity to determine eligibility. According to Fleming’s office, each resident will receive a “Patriot Score” based on past Facebook posts, political commentary, and “overall tone toward leadership.”
“Louisianans can reclaim their lost assets anytime,” Fleming said, “but if you’ve been posting nonsense about me online, don’t expect a check.”
Screenshots from his campaign page show Fleming personally engaging in heated exchanges with critics, accusing one conservative activist of attempting to “ambush” him, and another of “abandoning her mission” to pursue “political punditry.”
The Treasurer insists this isn’t about punishment, it’s about “restoring trust in the process.” Critics, however, note that the scoring system appears to favor users who have liked or shared Fleming’s own campaign posts.
“I am perplexed at the sudden abundance of Republicans who think chasing people away is sound electoral strategy,” one commenter wrote.
Applicants with low scores, assuming Fleming’s unhinged social media manager hasn’t blocked them yet, will reportedly be “encouraged to reflect, re-evaluate, and reapply next fiscal year.”
