ST. GEORGE, LA – Baton Rouge officials have announced that the soon-to-open Highland and Pecue intersection will be inducted into the National Museum of Poor Planning, a prestigious honor usually reserved for projects like the I-10 widening, Florida Boulevard expansion, and every bridge idea in East Baton Rouge since 1968.
The new design funnels thousands of cars from the upcoming Pecue Lane I-10 exit directly onto Pecue Lane, a two-lane street best known for its scenic oak trees, luxury homes, and total inability to handle more than 6 cars per minute. Originally slated for a traffic circle, the plan was downgraded to a stoplight after residents complained that a roundabout might clash with their wrought-iron gates.
“This isn’t a mistake,” one DOTD spokesperson insisted. “It’s a case study. Future generations will look at Pecue and Highland and say, ‘Wow, that’s how you trap 3 lanes of rush hour interstate traffic in a two-lane 3 way intersection a couple miles away.’”
Local homeowners, meanwhile, are bracing for the daily gridlock but say they remain optimistic. “We fought the traffic circle, and we won,” one resident explained proudly. “Now I get to sit in front of my million-dollar house and watch traffic back up as far as the eye can see. That’s what victory looks like.”
Experts predict the Pecue and Highland light will be so efficient, it could cut commute times all the way down to the speed of Government Street construction or Siegen Lane between 5:00 am and 11:00 pm on any given day.
