City Council’s New Motto: ‘Til Debt Do Us Part’—Alimony Tax to Mend Municipal Finances
Baton Rouge officials have a bold new plan to fix the budget—taxing the already emotionally bankrupt. The alimony tax is back, and this time, it’s not just personal. It’s painfully civic.
Central Mayor Storms Baton Rouge City Hall Demanding Credit for Discovering The Sadvocate
Central Mayor Wade Evans says he dove under a Spanish Town float for a Sadvocate tumbler, printed his own shirt, and now Baton Rouge is trying to ride the irony wave he created. “Pick a different fake news source,” he demanded.
Former Mayor Shocked That St. George Organizers Listened to her and Formed City, Considers Suing Herself
Former Mayor Sharon Weston Broome is reportedly stunned to learn that the organizers of St. George actually listened to her advice from 2012. Now, after suing to stop what she set in motion, she may consider legal action against herself.
Mayor Cantrell Asks School Board if They’ll Take a Post-Dated $10 Million Check for Payment
After being ordered to pay $10 million to the Orleans Parish School Board, Mayor LaToya Cantrell reportedly handed over a post-dated check, reassuring officials, “Y’all don’t run that yet, I’m waiting on my taxes to hit, k?” The school board is still considering its options.
St. George Candidates Scrap Election, Opt for Cage Matches Instead
With scandals, hookers, salary demands, and government structure disputes causing chaos in St. George, candidates have found a simple solution: ditch democracy and throw hands. The first municipal leadership determined by knockout might actually be the most efficient.
Mayor Cantrell Confuses Fifth Amendment With a Fifth of Hennessy at Hearing
Mayor Cantrell shocked legal experts when she pleaded the Fifth during an NOPD hearing—only to later clarify she was actually talking about the fifth of Hennessy she drank beforehand.