HAMMOND, LA – Southeastern Louisiana University officials are pushing back on accusations that they terminated environmental scientist Fereshteh Emami over her research into toxic pollutants in Lake Maurepas. Instead, they say the decision was based on “repeated, flagrant, and frankly unsettling” use of the Comic Sans font in academic presentations.
“This had absolutely nothing to do with her research,” said one university official. “The problem was typographic in nature. She presented graphs on toxic metals using Comic Sans. Some slides even had smiley faces. There were donors watching… we can’t have that.”
Sources inside the university say colleagues raised concerns as early as last fall, when Emami gave a symposium talk titled “Pollution Is Bad :(” with each word in a different pastel shade.
“It undermined the credibility of the science,” said one administrator, visibly shaken. “One slide had a radioactive symbol… in Comic Sans italics.”
Despite growing support from the scientific community, the university maintains its stance: “You can present disturbing data, or you can use Comic Sans. But you may not do both.”
