BATON ROUGE, La. – In a groundbreaking move to fix the city’s crumbling finances—if not its roads—Baton Rouge officials have unveiled the “Adopt-a-Pothole” initiative, allowing residents to sponsor their favorite street crater for parties, watch events, or quiet reflection.
For just $49.99 a month, participants receive naming rights, a personalized yard sign, and a complimentary 10 x 10 pop up canopy to enhance any LSU football viewing experience. For an extra $10, the city will toss in a Bluetooth speaker and waive liability for minor injuries, provided attendees sign the standard 14-page waiver.
The city says rental proceeds will help plug budget shortfalls inherited from the former mayor’s term, which featured decaying infrastructure, mismanaged grants, and a taxpayer-funded downtown “welcome center” that’s never been open during business hours.
“We realized we could either fill them, or fill them with people,” said a city spokesperson. “And honestly, this was cheaper.”
To boost visibility and “give back to the community,” local billboard mogul and attorney Gordon McKernan has announced he’ll personally cover the cost of renting any pothole for LSU game day—provided attendees with at least 1,000+ Facebook followers agree to post a minimum of 10 selfies with a branded “Get Gordon” yard sign clearly visible in each.
