BATON ROUGE, LA – LSU officials announced Friday that football ticket and parking prices will rise for the 2026 season, citing the university’s ongoing commitment to “providing fans with the highest possible caliber of disappointment.”
The price hike, approved unanimously by the Board of Supervisors, will reportedly ensure that every moment of frustration inside Tiger Stadium continues to feel “authentically premium.” One administrator explained the move by saying, “It’s not just about watching football, it’s about experiencing heartache in high definition.”
Sources inside the athletic department say the increase will help fund “new and improved ways to lose winnable games,” including better lighting for fourth-quarter collapses and upgraded speakers so fans can clearly hear the postgame excuses.
Coach Brian Kelly voiced support for the decision, saying, “If we expect a championship level experience, we’ve got to charge championship level ticket pricing.”
Fans, meanwhile, expressed mixed reactions, with many admitting they’ll still pay because “misery just hits different in Death Valley.”
The university confirmed that ticket holders in the new “Platinum Loyalty Section” will also receive a commemorative “We’ll Get ‘Em Next Year” towel, perfect for wiping away tears or throwing during interceptions.
