Escaped Inmate Calls 911 After Ending Up on Siegen Lane, Begs to Return to Prison

A work-release inmate’s escape ended in sheer terror when he found himself on Siegen Lane, surrounded by vagrants, impromptu street vendors, and unlicensed security guards. In fear, he called 911—begging to go back to prison.
Elon Musk Announces Plan to Colonize Siegen Lane, Says It’s More Dangerous Than Mars but Has Better Food

In an unprecedented shift from space travel, Elon Musk has announced plans to colonize Siegen Lane, citing its “hostile environment, unpredictable inhabitants, and the highest concentration of fast food restaurants per square mile outside the Deep South.”