CATS Confirms Only Employee Without Indictment Was a Bus Driver, Names Him CEO
After a wave of indictments emptied CATS’ executive offices, officials confirmed the agency’s only unindicted employee, a longtime bus driver, has been promoted to CEO.
CATS Spokesman Confirms Indictment Count Has Officially Surpassed Ridership
CATS confirmed the number of former officials under indictment has officially surpassed daily ridership, a milestone officials described as inevitable given years of empty buses and active investigations.
CATS Officials Assure Public That New Indictments Were Already Accounted For in Original Budget
Officials said the indictments would not disrupt operations, explaining that arrests, audits, and criminal investigations were already factored into long-term planning and routine dysfunction.
Recent CATS Indictment Suggests Bus System Actually Had Money at Some Point, Shocking Local Residents
The indictment stunned Baton Rouge residents, many of whom admitted they were unaware the Capital Area Transit System had money available to steal.
CATS CFO Quits Amid Pressure To Explain Why a $30 Million Budget Only Produces Two Working Buses
The former CATS CFO resigned after being asked to justify how a thirty million dollar budget results in fewer operational buses than most school field trips.
State Legislators Suggest City-Parish Takeover of CATS, Citing Their Expertise in Going Nowhere
Local leaders promise big transit upgrades, starting with the important stuff—like a new logo and committee meetings. The only physical improvement so far? A brand-new bus stop surrounded by caution tape and bulldozers.
CATS Drivers to Strike: Ridership Numbers to Remain Unchanged at Nearly Zero
Baton Rouge’s bus drivers are set to strike tomorrow, but officials predict no major disruptions—mostly because ridership was already nonexistent. The biggest change? The city’s empty buses just won’t be moving.