BATON ROUGE, La. – The CATS bus strike is officially over, and city officials are celebrating the return of service—while also warning commuters not to get their hopes up.
“We understand the excitement of having public transportation back,” said a city spokesperson. “But let’s be realistic—this is still CATS. If you’ve got to be at work by 8 a.m. tomorrow, you might want to go ahead and start heading to the bus stop now.”
City officials claim the resolution of the strike is a major victory. “Public transit is the future,” said one representative. “Now if only we could get people to use it.”
To prevent future strikes, CATS announced plans to streamline operations. “We’ll now be running half the buses we used to,” said a rep. “That way, drivers have fewer reasons to complain, and riders have more time to reflect on their life choices while waiting.”
CATS encouraged frustrated riders to call the customer service hotline for assistance, but no one answered—because the hotline operators were still waiting for the bus themselves.
