NOPD Confirms Shia LaBeouf’s Behavior “Indistinguishable From Average Mardi Gras Tourist”
Turns out you can blend into Bourbon Street all night, but the second you start giving performance notes to a brass band, someone’s calling NOPD.
NOPD Suggests Tourists Try Not Looking So “Phone-Having” While Walking Bourbon Street
NOPD has a simple tip for Carnival visitors this year: enjoy Mardi Gras, just try not to look aggressively “phone-having” in the middle of Bourbon Street.
Cantrell Announces Plan to “Preserve Authenticity” by Letting Bourbon Street Collapse Naturally
Mayor LaToya Cantrell has unveiled a plan to “preserve the authenticity” of New Orleans nightlife by letting Bourbon Street decay naturally a preservation strategy that relies less on funding and more on physics.
Bourbon Street Barriers Awarded City’s First-Ever Participation Trophy in Public Safety
New Orleans has officially honored Bourbon Street’s weakest defenders: the push-over barriers. In a ceremony dripping with irony, city officials awarded them the first-ever Participation Trophy in Public Safety, celebrating not success, but the sheer audacity of just showing up every day.
New Orleans Mayor Names Bourbon Street Hustler as Tourism Ambassador During Paris Gala
Mayor LaToya Cantrell has outdone herself, naming Danette Colbert, the infamous “Bourbon Street Hustler,” as New Orleans’ new Tourism Ambassador during a bougie, taxpayer-funded soirée at the Palace of Versailles.