NEW ORLEANS, LA – In a groundbreaking political maneuver, Democrats in New Orleans have accomplished what no one thought possible: rejecting government assistance. For a party often synonymous with seeking government aid, this rare display of independence comes not in housing, healthcare, or disaster relief, but in crime control.
With the police department operating at a 44% shortage, the National Guard offered free reinforcements to help stabilize the city. Local Democrats, however, bravely declined, citing concerns that soldiers in the streets would make residents “feel unsafe.” Observers noted that armed robberies and daily shootings apparently don’t have the same unsettling effect.
Councilmember Helena Moreno led the charge, assuring voters that optics outweigh outcomes. “We don’t need solutions,” she explained, “we need principles. And rejecting federal help, for once, feels historic.”
Criminals across the city celebrated the announcement, praising local leaders for finally embracing “true self-reliance.” One masked resident remarked, “It’s refreshing to see Democrats finally reject a handout, especially one that might’ve interfered with our business.”
For New Orleanians, the message is clear: this isn’t just politics, it’s progress. The city has officially proven it can reject Washington’s help, even if it means accepting more crime.
